This is Annette, she joined the Stress Less Weight Mastery after gaining back 40 pounds in 6 months of the 60 pounds she had previously lost in a sensible health maintenance program. She went through a hard time which she describes as feeling:
Useless and depressed, sadness, stress, anxiety, hopelessness [it] weighed so heavily on me that food was my only comfort most days.
But she wanted to retire at the end of the year, so she knew she needed to make changes so she could have energy and a positive outlook on life.
After she went through the Stress Less Weight Mastery she reports:
- No longer managing her stress/emotions with late-night “I don’t care” binging
- Handles stress better – no longer needs her “as needed” anxiety medicine that she took most days
- Family and friends note that she has more joy
- Lost 7 pounds in 14 weeks
Annette says…
Now I can look at myself in the mirror, with or without clothes, and not feel any self-hatred, shame, or disgust. I can accept me for who I am in the moment. I am beautiful and I matter. I smile more and cry less.
Congrats Annette!
Now, imagine if you had similar results to Annette.
The effects of stress on your hormones and weight
When you feel stressed (either in your mind or body) it increases the stress hormone cortisol.
Cortisol is released when your body undergoes stressful situations. Beyond just psychological stress (such as deadlines, arguments, or aging parents, for example), it can also be caused by things such as:
- Sleep deprivation
- Blood sugar imbalance
- Inflammation
- … and restrictive dieting, of course.
Menopause and aging also independently can slow down metabolism.
This sluggish metabolism is one reason women will gain weight even when eating normal amounts of food.
The other reason is that calorie restriction stresses the body out, which raises the stress hormone cortisol, and can shift the body into fat storage mode.
This can cause women to eat very little during the day, and then have hormone-fueled cravings at night that are very intense and hard to fight with willpower.
So how do you win against a stress hormone?
It can feel discouraging to know that a hormone is causing your cravings and making you feel out of control. I get it. But the good news is, there are some very actionable steps you can take toward reducing cortisol and de-stressing your life.
Let’s walk through the 4 Steps to Unapologetic Self-Love to Heal Emotional Eating. These are the very same steps I used to heal my emotional eating and the same principles I’ve used to help over 100 women heal their out-of-control eating.
To find out the exact steps you need to take to heal emotional eating, and the most impactful actions to get you started, download my free guide “You’re Done Dieting, But Still Want to Heal Emotional Eating”.
1. Unapologetic Self-Love of Your Body
The first step to Unapologetic Self-Love to Heal Emotional Eating is learning to love your body. Weight and all.
The biggest step toward balancing the stress hormone cortisol is by focusing on accepting and loving yourself exactly where you are. Focusing on calming your nervous system by implementing:
- Anti-inflammatory and blood-sugar balancing nutrition.
- Getting a full, restful 7-8 hours of sleep. (Yes even for aging women!)
- Grounding practices to help you stay present.
- Moving your body to produce energy and endorphins (not to change your shape).
- Learn to trust your body and heed your appetite so you can care for yourself.
From a lifestyle approach, you can focus on daily stress management practices that will increase your resilience with stress and balance cortisol.
When cortisol is balanced, those intense urges to eat go away. Anna, a client who successfully completed the program, said it perfectly when she said “You finally get the freedom to make healthy choices”.
When hormones are balanced, you know cookies still taste good, but you are able to, for perhaps the first time, introduce some logic and reasoning into whether or not you want to eat them.
Hormone balance also frees up your mental space and energy to tackle the emotional and mindset pieces that lead to overeating. Which leads me to the next step…
2. Unapologetic Self-Love of Your Mind
Unapologetic Self-Love of your Mind starts with Self-Compassion. 
There are 3 elements of self-compassion as defined by a researcher, Dr. Kristin Neff, that helps to explain why self-compassion heals emotional eating and all or nothing thinking.
- Mindfulness vs. Overidentification – This allows you to recognize how you feel without needing to numb or escape, but also not getting so lost in your feelings that you lose touch with reality or lose your power to change by becoming a victim.
- Self-Kindness vs. Self-Judgement – Being nice to yourself makes it safe to feel your emotions because you aren’t constantly criticizing yourself, leading to difficult feelings that make you want comfort food.
- Common humanity vs. Isolation – Shame about your eating habits and body are keeping you stuck feeling unworthy of connection and love from other people. Sharing your story with safe people helps you realize you aren’t alone and heal.
Implementing Self-Love for your mind
Not only does self-compassion allow you to feel your emotions so you don’t have to eat them…
Self-compassion also allows you to change the unhelpful all-or-nothing thinking which self-sabotages by convincing you to finish the bag and restart later. It allows you to see the partial successes and grey areas and build momentum from those rather than having to restart from square 1 every Monday.
Self-compassion also reminds you of your worthiness of self-care. If you need some help along the way, it can help to have a list of things to do instead of eating. That way you’re equipped to handle emotional food cravings when they happen.
3. Unapologetic Self-Love of Your Heart
To care for yourself well, you have to recognize that you are doing the best you can give how well your needs are being met.
And, the reason you are emotionally eating, is because it works.
Self-Love of your Heart involves recognizing you are using food to avoid or numb your emotions and learning to safely feel them.
It’s good to remind yourself that feeling things isn’t bad, even if the emotions are uncomfortable, or even painful. Your emotions are helpful tools, like checking engine lights, letting you know how you are doing. They are not failings or drawbacks, but an essential part of who you are.
Practicing self-compassion allows you to safely feel your emotions and rewire unhelpful thought patterns.
4. Unapologetic Self-Love of Your Soul
The step towards Unapologetic Self Love to heal emotional eating is caring for your soul. 
This may sound a little out there, but let me explain.
The final step is to acknowledge yourself as a human being just as worthy of self-love as the people in your life you care for, and devote your resources (time, energy, money) towards yourself.
You can get back in touch with your soul by:
- Identifying and pursuing your desires, so you don’t have to rely on food for pleasure and self-care.
- Setting boundaries with your relationships and time so you aren’t always last on your to-do list.
- Becoming an expert on your own self so you can meet your needs without extra eating.
To find out the exact steps you need to take to heal emotional eating, and the most impactful actions to get you started, download my free guide “You’re Done Dieting, But Still Want to Heal Emotional Eating”.